Elevator Corpse Prank

Ready or Not

This guest post from Mickey Garza

I’ve been preparing for my ankle surgery for the past few weeks. I had the huge urge to begin cleaning the entire house. I am taking it one room at a time and of course this is on top of my daily activities that pull this home together at the end of most days. A great show on direct tv winston salem gave me the idea and inspiration of cleaning out and de-cluttering. Beginning in the master closet, I was able to thin it down to almost half on the first day. It feels so spacious in there now and I don’t miss a single item so far. I took this concept a step further and began trudging through the junk drawers of the kitchen. Those babies need purged once a year at least. I even decided to treat myself to a new comforter and shams for the spare room since I will be using it primarily after the surgery because trying to sleep in a cast and not wake your significant other is challenging. At this point I am feeling pretty good about my preparedness as my time off my feet is quickly approaching.

The Trouble With Taking a Man Shopping

The letter I received from the store:

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras:

1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to

which twenty children obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. October 3: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.

11. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels on his chest.

12. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, he yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

13. October 22 : When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN! '

14. Took a box of condoms to the check out clerk and asked where the fitting room was?

And last, but not least:

15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, and then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.'

One of the clerks passed out.

funny acupuncture

you were snoring

Are you prepared?

Everyone always say...are you prepared for the future?  It's one of those things that is so easy to put off.  Life happens.  Money is not being saved.  Preparations are not being made.  


For me, it is one of those things that I do not really want to think about.  I want to think that I will be here forever to take care of my own responsibilities. Haha!  That sounds realistic!  Right?

Maybe it doesn't have to be as difficult as it seems.  Maybe if I just set one day aside to handle things like making a will, life insurance, and setting up the proper savings account with automatic monthly contributions taken from my checking account, it would just be done.   


This has become a priority for me because of my personal life.  Recently,  I have seen friends and family members suffer personal losses.  Either losing a job or the loss of someones life.  In most of these situations, no matter what their age, they were not prepared financially.  Even though this may mean that I have to make small sacrifices now, it will pay off if their is an emergency down the line.  I would rather make small sacrifices than to loose everything because I was not prepared.